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I believe we birth best where we feel safest. For me, after a negative birth center interaction in labor, I ended up at a hospital and had a negative experience with the midwife on call. The day after my oldest was born I knew that my next baby would be born at home.
I loved the comfort and convenience of being at home, but it was my providers who made my second and third pregnancy and birth experiences so exceptional. I don’t think homebirth is for everyone, but I do believe everyone who gives birth could benefit from the homebirth midwifery model of care. I’m endlessly grateful to the midwives in Philadelphia and New Orleans who attended my births.
Asked for permission to touch my belly at every appointment
Yes, literally every single appointment. And it took me a long time to stop being surprised by this.
I had spent decades trying to make providers feel comfortable treating me, no matter how uncomfortable I was. It was clear that my midwives had no assumptions about access to or control over my body.
Never performed or recommended a cervical check unless I asked
The frequency of cervical checks leading up to due dates and during labor is astounding to me. Not only is this an uncomfortable and invasive process, but in almost all scenarios, it's not useful information and not a good data point for decision making.
Practiced true informed consent
They didn’t operate with assumptions about what decisions I’d make about my body or my baby’s. They have guidelines for what is or isn’t compatible with safe homebirth, but as long as I stayed within those boundaries, they didn’t operate with the assumption that I would adopt a set of standard practices.
They informed me about available testing, unbiased pros and cons to each choice, available alternatives and their pros and cons, and their anecdotal or personal opinions were clearly disclosed as such. And they never used fear, power, or ideology to influence my decisions.
Practiced oxytocin supporting behavior during labor and birth
My midwives moved slowly and quietly, never towering above me. They figured out how to accommodate whatever position and environment felt best for me. Gentle suggesting a position change when it was clear that I was struggling to find relief.
They refrained from speaking or moving around during contractions. They dropped whatever stress or chaos they held from before my birth at the door.
Viewed my birth plan as an opportunity to care for me better, not as adversarial
They did this in many different ways - but one moment in particular stays with me. During my third birth (second homebirth), I really wanted to try to push less and let baby come down on her own. One of my midwives very gently whispered a reminder to me at the perfect moment. And I shifted slightly away from intense bearing down and more towards breath and opening.
I was glad logistically to make that shift, but it was even more meaningful to feel that individualized, thoughtful kind of care.
Waited an extended period and asked for my permission to clamp the umbilical cord and perform the newborn exam
In a non emergent situation, nothing is more urgent than uninterrupted skin to skin and giving mom and baby time to integrate the work they just did together.
One thing that differentiates most homebirth midwifery training from standard hospital procedures is how they do what needs to be done while prioritizing the motherbaby dyad and with deep concern for the nervous-system and how raw that window of time is. This is the case for normal newborn care and emergencies like resuscitation or postpartum hemorrhage.
Provided in home care for the first two weeks postpartum
Homebirth midwives are trained in parent and newborn care for the first 6 weeks. They check on healing and adjusting, support with feeding, and help you feel confident settling in to life with baby, all in the comfort of home.